


Nena Hamburguesa Sin Tomate's Couch

by quadmika



Category: Original Work
Genre: Awkward First Times, Demons, First Kiss, First Time, Homophobic Language, Love Confessions, M/M, Trans Male Character, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-18 16:26:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14217123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quadmika/pseuds/quadmika
Summary: Salem lives with Nena.





	Nena Hamburguesa Sin Tomate's Couch

**Author's Note:**

> haha i hate my ocs  
> sumthin i wrote months ago but figured i should start posting my wiritng somewhere since this account is ancient and my last actual writing is from like 2015  
> even if all i do write anymore is ocs  
> anyway call me a gay loser on my twitter @DJHARDYAOI69

If Poppy and Nena had really gone to the store like they said they were, they would have been back by now. Salem sighs to himself as he sits on Nena's couch, legs crossed and head leaned back as he tries to relax. He was utterly and completely bored out of his mind. He had already cleaned the entire apartment until it was sparkling, rearranged all the food in the fridge, and even washed the balcony outside. He knew Nena and Poppy were off somewhere, up to their usual antics so he couldn't bother them. Vuffy? Absolutely not. The tension between them was too awkward, at least for Salem. Even though it seemed nonexistent to Vuffy, like she was never tracking him down for her vampire bounty hunting duties in the first place. That left one person. Blair.

Salem lets out another sigh, this time more out of frustration. His relationship with Blair was... complicated, to say the least. He obviously had a crush on him, that much was obvious to everyone except Blair himself. Blair also drove him crazy with his stupid jokes and mannerisms, which he would never admit that he thought they were endearing in a way. So, he was lovestruck for a total idiot and he was just so... frustrated about it.

Still, he wanted to see him now that the thought had popped in his head. With a shuffle of his body and a lean to the left he pulls his phone out of his pocket, a flip phone Nena had gotten him just in case the either of them ended up in some stupid shenanigans like usual. Flipping the fossil open, he pulls up his contacts as he remembered Nena showing him how to. He smashes the button a bit too hard each time, until the contact "Ugly" was highlighted and he hits the "call" button. He didn't know how to text, and he wasn't going to bother trying. After only ringing once, said boy picks up the phone which takes Salem by surprise. Nena usually had to call him three or four times before he picked up, and Poppy didn't even bother calling.

"Um, hi..." he says quietly into the receiver, not exactly sure what to say now. He realizes he probably should have thought about what he was even calling for before making the call.

"Salem? Salem! You're using your phone!" he sounds excited, almost like he had been waiting for Salem to call him for a long time.

"Yeah... Nena showed me how to use it. I mean, how to call at least. I haven't gotten used to texting yet." Salem gives a small laugh under his breath. He had never been good with technology. He was forty seven, after all. Blair was beaming through the phone, his usual grin easy to detect in his voice. 

"I'm glad! Now I can talk to you more often!" Blair says casually, like it wasn't going to make Salem's cheeks overheat. Suddenly, he was grateful Blair couldn't see him. He was happy, though. Recently it seems the two of them had grown closer, and Salem could talk to him easily. 

"Um, yeah. Listen, am I interrupting anything? Nena and Poppy are gone and I'm bored." He gets straight to the point, chewing at his lip as he listens for Blair's response. 

"N-No, just playing with my cat! I'll be over in a few minutes, sit tight!" Blair answers immediately without even thinking about it, and Salem hears shuffling as Blair stands up quickly to put his shoes on. Salem can't help but feel a smile tug at the corners of his lips as he imagines Blair playing with said cat, the image tugging at his heartstrings. 

"Okay... I'll see you then." Salem nods and hangs up, tossing his phone across the couch and laying back. He kicks his leg and groans, covering his face with one of the pillows decorating the ancient couch. 

Blair arrives quickly just as he said. It wasn't a surprise; he lived close by in the same apartment complex. He lets himself in, chirping out a bubbly greeting as Salem peeks up at him from the couch. Salem glances him over, a small blush still dusting his cheeks. His hair was down instead of being pulled into his usual ponytail, and his shoes weren't even tied. Did he really rush over here that quickly...? Why? Salem couldn't help but wonder if there was a reason, but quickly decides against it. Blair was just Blair, sloppy and a bit lazy. It's not like he wanted to see him that bad... right?

"Your shoes are untied." Salem notes to him out loud as he sits up, smoothing out his hair that had fallen out of place. Blair looks down at his feet and shrugs. He kicks them off lazily, then goes to readjust them neatly, just for the sake of Salem being a so adamant about things being in order.

"Easier to take off, I'm only a few floors away." he gives another shrug, plopping down next to Salem on the floral print couch, a little too close. Salem blinks a few times as he registers how close Blair was to him, and averts his eyes to the TV in front of him that was turned off.

"Your hairs down, too. You didn't have to rush, you know." Salem glances at him quickly, taking in his features. It was a little odd, seeing him with his hair down. Salem wouldn't admit it, not in this lifetime, but he thought Blair looked... handsome, maybe? He mentally slaps himself upside the head for thinking that, returning his gaze to the unplugged TV. He didn't know what else to look at, and eye contact with Blair was sure to make him combust. 

"Oh, no. It's fine! The cat took my scrunchie and I didn't bother getting another one." he laughs, and the idea of his cat ripping the hair tie out of his hair makes a small laugh rise in his throat. He glances back at Blair from the corner of his eye, about to say some snide remark when he forgets what he was going to say entirely.

... Was the space between them getting smaller? 

It seemed Blair was inching towards him, and almost seemed nervous himself. Maybe he was imagining the last part, but he was definitely closer than he was before. He almost looked like he was thinking hard about what he was going to say, which was odd, since Blair usually just blurts out whatever thought he has as soon as he has it. 

"Um," Salem starts, trying to think of something to do or even talk about, but he's interrupted by Blair turning to face him directly. He snaps his mouth shut, looking at the other boy nervously. It was much easier to talk on the phone when he gets nervous like this being with him in person, he realizes.

"Um, Salem, actually..." Blair mumbles, his usual loud and enthusiastic voice replaced with a serious and quiet one, a voice that sounded almost worried.  
"Salem, Salem, Salem..." he mutters out loud, closing his eyes and sighing as he leans back against the couch. 

Salem tilts his head in confusion, not sure what Blair was going on about. He was usually confusing and hard to understand, but he never looked this serious.

"What, what is it?" he laughs nervously, Blair now inches apart from him. 

"... Can I kiss you?" he asks suddenly, turning his attention directly back to Salem. His facial expression was serious, and Salem could tell he wasn't joking. Still, he wasn't completely sure what Blair was doing.

"Can you...? Huh?!" he forces out a laugh, trying to brush it off as a joke. There was no way Blair had feelings for him, right? This was a stupid prank, or he was curious, or some other weird reason only Blair could be the source of.

"T-That's not funny, Blair..." he mumbles, snapping his head to turn away to regain some distance between them.

"I'm serious." he says with a low voice, taking Salem's chin in his hand. He turns his head to face him, their faces hardly inches apart. "I really, really want to kiss you, Salem." 

Salem averts his eyes, his stomach queasy as he tries and fails to swallow the lump in his throat. He slowly nods, letting his eyes flutter shut gently as he leans in and readies himself. Why would he refuse? He had feelings for Blair, after all. 

"F-Fine..." the smaller boy whispers, earning a soft smile from the usually rambunctious boy. Blair tucks out of place strands of hair behind Salem's ear, cupping his cheek and promptly pressing their lips together. 

If Salem was alive, his heart would definitely be beating faster than usual. His hands were shaking as he tries to figure out what to do with them. Blair gives a soft chuckle, finding it adorable how inexperienced Salem is and how hard he's trying.

It's a short kiss, over just as quickly as it started. Salem's left completely red faced and just as confused, trying to piece together the situation in his head as Blair smiles at him gently. He was so much softer than usual, taking Salem's hand gently as if the boy were made of glass.

"Wh... Why...?" the turtlenecked vampire grumbles softly, staring at the floor as he couldn't bring himself to look Blair in the eyes. Blair chuckles lightly, shaking his head and cupping Salem's cheek once more.

"Isn't is obvious, stupid? I have feelings for you." He gives this information matter of factly, saying it in a tone so casual it's like he wasn't just thinking himself into a headache over it.

Salem couldn't really comprehend what he was being told. Or, rather, he could, but he was having a hard time catching up. Blair... liked him? Words refused to form, any attempt at a response was futile.

"... Please respond. I like you. Romantically. Homosexually. I think about kissing you and all that gay shit." The blonde boy goes on to explain, and Salem wonders just how he can say those things so easily. 

"That's...! That's embarrassing... But, um... I guess... I mean... I feel the same way?" Salem huffs, covering his face with his hands to hide the smile threatening to make itself known. Blair laughs again, his usual goofy expression returning. He reaches out to take Salem's wrists, pulling his hands from his face and tugging him into his chest. Blair wraps his arms around him, closing his eyes and nuzzling his face into his shoulder. 

"I know it's embarrassing." his usual tone of voice had completely returned, no longer uneasy about admitting his feelings. His voice is muffled by the fabric of Salem's tacky turtleneck, the one he had grown to love so much. They sit in silence for awhile, Salem focusing on Blair's breathing and Blair focusing on Salem's lack of.

"Oh man, Poppy's definitely gonna call me a faggot now." Blair laughs suddenly, pulling back from Salem's shoulder. Salem giggles himself, pulling away to properly sit back on the couch, leaning against Blair. 

"She'd do that regardless." Salem notes, his cheeks still a deep shade of red. Although, they were nowhere near as noticeable as Blair's. Blair nods in agreement, pulling him up in his lap and wrapping his arms back around him. He couldn't seem to keep his hands off the vampiric boy. Not that said boy minded.

~

After being together for a few weeks, Poppy calling Blair a faggot every time she saw him died down back to the regular amount. Everything was practically the same, since Salem was incredibly embarrassed by PDA. Still, Blair snuck in kisses and means of affection as often as he could get away with. 

Now, they've ended up in a similar situation as before, where Nena and Poppy (and this time Vuffy!) are off doing some kind of lesbian shenanigans, leaving Blair and Salem behind on the antique couch. While kissing and touching each other innocently enough as usual, Salem felt himself wishing for something more. He's a forty seven year old virgin, though. Sure, that was normal for a vampire but... Blair has literal centuries of experience under his belt.

Blair ends up hovering over him, his hands up his shirt, tugging at it in a silent request of removal. Parting the kiss for a moment, Salem slips the turtleneck off of himself. Instead of tossing it, he folds it and places it down on the floor next to the couch, which causes Blair to laugh loudly.

"W-What's so funny...?" Salem huffs, turning a bit red at Blair's response. He couldn't help it, what if it wrinkled...!

"Nothing, nothing. You're just... so cute." He laughs again, leaning down to kiss at his neck now that the pesky turtleneck was gone. Salem groans, tugging at Blair's shirt to instruct him to take his off. 

"Shut up..." Salem remarks as Blair slides the t-shirt over his head, tossing it to the side. He chuckles before he gently rubs his hands against Salem's sides, trailing kisses down his chest and stomach.

"Is this... okay?" Blair looks up at Salem from the crotch of his spread legs, fingers on the button of his pants and eager to slide them off. Salem nods vigorously, his eagerness becoming more obvious. Blair smirks at Salem's want to be touched, quickly unbuttoning the boys pants and tugging at them, tossing them to the side much to Salem's disapproval. 

"Don't worry. If they wrinkle I'll iron them." Blair promises. He wouldn't, but he wanted Salem to feel better. He was getting eager himself, after all, and some pants getting wrinkled were the least of his worries. Salem looks at him doubtfully and sighs, nodding anyway.

Blair didn't care about some pair of pants, not with the sight of Salem underneath him. His body Blair found so beautiful mixed with that facial expression he was making made him forget about anything else that could be important. Salem beneath him in those tacky patterned briefs is all he could care about.

He exhales as Salem looks up at him, moving his hand down to the crotch of Salem's underwear, gently pressing his fingers against it and rubbing slowly as he leans upwards to kiss him. Salem closes his eyes, wrapping his arms around the demon's neck and holding him as close to him as he can manage as they exchange passionate kisses.  
Blair grins, pulling back and licking his lips when he recognizes the wet feeling of the fabric he was rubbing against.

"You're wet." he points out into his ear in a low voice, teasing him slightly. Salem can only mumble something under his breath, causing another chuckle to come from Blair.

Without warning, Blair slips his hand inside Salem's underwear and rubs his middle finger in between the boy's legs. A small noise forces itself from the back of his throat from the unexpected and sudden touch, his grip around Blair tightening. Blair takes that as an indication of pleasure, slowly pushing two fingers inside Salem's entrance as the slick wetness coats his fingers. Salem grits his teeth, the unfamiliar but pleasant feeling like heat in between his legs. Blair slowly starts working his fingers, pumping them in and out of the smaller boy beneath him. He crooks his fingers, bending them upwards and gradually quickening his thrusts. 

"B-Blair... Do you have protection by any chance?" Salem huffs out, hoping that he did. Blair understood what the boy was implying, and nods vigorously as he shuffles around and pulls his wallet out of his pocket to find a condom he had wedged in there.

"... Wow, I wasn't expecting you to actually have anything." Salem laughs, scooting backwards and peeling off his underwear, dropping them on top of the turtleneck next to him.

"Well honestly, I used to just carry them around because Poppy hated it when I would put them on my feet to harass her, or blow them up and draw a face in sharpie and call it my son, or-"

"Okay, I get it, you're an idiot. Put it on before I change my mind." He snickers. Suddenly, he was grateful that Blair was so damn weird. The demon nods, unzipping his pants and ripping open the condom package like a barbarian. He rolls it on, trying to get it on as fast as he can manage. 

"Okay, okay! Okay. We're good. It's on.” He nods his head, shuffling back in between Salem and positioning himself. He chews at his lip, rubbing the tip of his cock against Salem's slit. 

“Are... you ready?” Blair gulps, suddenly nervous. Salem just gives a nod, looking a bit impatient as Blair takes a deep breath, slowly pushing himself into the boy. He leans down, leaving kisses on his neck and jawline. Once his entire length was inside, Salem shivers and pulls Blair into a lock again. Blair exhales, drawing his hips back and thrusting himself right back inside. That earned him a small noise from Salem, who buries his face in Blair's shoulder to hide his face of embarrassment.

Blair whispers sweet nothings into Salem's ear to ease some of his embarrassment, rocking his hips as he tries to find a rhythm that made the two of them feel good. Salem had a death grip on Blair at this point, panting quietly underneath him as he grinds his hips against Blair thrusting inside him. 

“Hah... Harder...” Salem mumbles quietly, his words made difficult to hear muffled by Blair's neck. Blair nods, drawing back and slamming his hips down hard against him. Panting heavily, he reaches his hand down in between Salem's legs, trying to keep himself steady with the other and leaning against the couch so he won't fall. He puts pressure on Salem's clit with his thumb, rubbing it in circles as he thrusts his hips roughly. Salem wraps his legs around the demon, panting heavily as small noises of pleasure force themselves to be heard as Blair’s thrusts quicken. 

“I... I’m gonna...” Salem grits his teeth, starting to feel heat building up in his lower body. He didn't want to say it, but Blair seemed to understand. 

“It's alright. I love you.” Blair exhales into Salem's ear, rubbing his thumb faster. He kisses his neck, nibbling and sucking on the skin of the boy underneath him, the boy he loves.

Salem nods, thrusting his own hips desperately against Blair thrusting inside him, the added stimulation of the rubbing sending him over the edge. He squeezes his eyes shut, clenching his fists as his knuckles turn white. His back arches, his body reacting on it's own as he tries his hardest not to cry out as he rides out the orgasm. He trembles, drool dripping from the side of his mouth as he tries to regain his composure. He loosens his grip on Blair, who gives him a kiss on his forehead before slowly withdrawing from inside the boy.

“... MY COUCH!”

Nena’s voice can be heard from the doorframe, as Poppy is holding her back from running in and taking swings at Blair. Salem's eyes snap open as he pushes Blair off of him, covering himself with one of the pillows on said couch. 

“I... Nena...! Um-” Salem starts, sputtering out apologies. Nena shakes her head, pointing at Blair.

“No, no. Blair Lulcifer, not only did you come in my house and seduce Salem, who didn't know Santa wasn't real until last year, YOU FUCKED ON MY GRANDMA'S COUCH! ¡TE VINISTE EN EL SOFA DE MI ABUELA MARICÓN DE MIERDA! I’LL KILL YOU!” She yells, Poppy tugging on her arm.

“Come on, they're dating. Salem can have the fuck sex if he wants. ... Just not on her Grandma's couch, guys!” Poppy huffs, trying to be level headed in the situation. She gives Nena's hand a squeeze, glancing down in her direction. Nena sighs, giving in to Poppy and rubbing her temples, closing the door with her foot.

“I just want to get through vet school. I really just want to get through vet school...” she grumbles to herself, walking off sluggishly to her bedroom as Poppy follows behind her.

LE FIN


End file.
